5.3.10

Hello! I know, I haven't written since Easter. Give me a break, ok? ;)
It feels like so much has been going on; I don't really know where to begin.

This week, we discovered a bird's nest in a tree near our house. The mother left her two baby birds. That night, we worried about them; it was so cold! My mom went to check on them and she said they were crying and shivering! So we took them in and put them in a basket with a heating pad. I got to hold them and feed them with a dropper! The tiniest one died the next day, but it looked like the bigger one was doing well. We named it Avery (since it sort of sounds like aviary). But the next day, I came home from my SAT and it had died. :(
My mom said, "I will never do that again! They died!" I said, "Well, at least the last few days before, they had love!"

So, last week, I went to a conference called Acquire the Fire with my youth group. It was so good!!! I got closer to my friends, met new friends, and had new thoughts about God. So good!
I hadn't gotten my new camera yet, so there are no pictures. :(
One of my favorite moments of the conference was the first session about God's love for us. I realized a huge problem that I hadn't consciously realized. I realized, I truly believe that God is going to leave. I have always had abandonment issues, but recently they've gotten worse. I realized that it got to the point where I believe it about everyone, even God. And I knew His word stated differently, but it didn't change how I felt (you see, I can be quite irrational sometimes). I discovered that I live in a constant state of fear. I couldn't stop crying and I felt so embarrassed because I was sitting by people I didn't know. It was pretty funny actually, I thought, Please don't see me in this state! Haha! It was good to realize the problem because I can now work to fix it.

So I feel like I'm very boring because I never post any pictures. What do you think? Should I start taking more pictures to post or is this fine? Because sometimes, posts aren't worth reading unless there's a picture or two. Comment and tell me what you think. :)

Well, I've gotta run. I hope you are doing well and enjoying your spring weather!